The day of reckoning (aka pageant times!)

Yesterday was the day of the pageant (I would of wrote it last night, but frankly too tired).

5:30 am- got up to prepare

8:10 am- left house for the train

8:30- am got on train

10:00- got to Croydon

10:30- after a mad rush (and asking the staff from gregg's for directions,) got to the venue

11:30- started rehearsals

13:00- break

14:00- more rehearsals
15:30- interview section 

16:00- break

17:20- start to get ready

18:30- ready to go

19:30- start

21:30- finish

22:20- leave the event

22:40- got on first train

23:20- got on second train
00:20- got to my station
00:40- got home

That may not seem so busy for some people, but honestly, it was such a tiring day! 

The beginning of the day went smoothly, I had a serious moment of when I wasn't going to do it. Thankfully I snapped out of it 15 minutes later. I am so glad I did, it was such a fun day, meeting such amazing girls!

After arriving, and checking in, we were in rehearsals. The rehearsals were mainly going through the running order, and how everything would work. That for me was the most fun. I love stomping it out, and hopefully channelled enough of Tyra. The organisers/judges seemed to like it, which is all that mattered. I had some serious nerves for most of the afternoon break, but when I was out there and stomping it out, I could focus on having fun. One of the things I was most proud of was the swimwear/summer fun round. I was dreading walking out there in my swimsuit, but I did it, and feigned enough confidence that no-one noticed!

I didn't get into the top 5, but frankly, I didn't go there to win. Yes, it would of been nice, but not essential. I did win the award for being best in interview though!

Miss Weston-Super-Mare and I were walking to get to the train station, when we bumped into one of the judges (who also knew where she was going!!!), and got talking about the pageant. She said to both of us that we were in her top 5. She said that it wasn't because we were walking with her, (who knows) but apparently I was her number 4. I think that's a good achievement too.

I am very glad that I met such nice girls there too. I will admit it, I was very nervous about what the other girls would be like, but meeting them all, they were all so lovely, and most of them hadn't done pageants before either. I was the only one (that I know) who went there to build my self confidence. The rest of the girls already had it. That in a way helped boost my confidence, because it showed these women all had curves, they looked beautiful, and they were proud. When I was talking to some of them, and explaining my reasons for applying, (being a tom-boy, it would give me the chance to be girly, and to try and tackle some of my self-worth issues) they said they had serious respect for me. I hope they realise that to me, they are my role models. They helped take down another brick or two from the wall. They are what I strive to be. I may do a pageant next year, I may not. What I do know though, is that I don't need to be a stick to be beautiful. Sex appeal isn't about size, it's what you do with it.  I can lose more weight, be healthy, and keep my curves. Most importantly,

Self worth doesn't come from being thin, it comes from being you. :) x

 (the soundtrack for yesterday!)